Magnifying glass

I just had the most horrible day. Well, it's not as horrible as it could have been - but it was bad, nonetheless. My trip to Mexico was fantastic - I've got a good story or two - but this one relates to today's events.

After 5 days of camping/traveling with the same group of people, we stopped at the conservation headquarters in Matamoros. My professor had alot on her mind, with all of us trying to cross the border and all and, forgetting I was still in the vehicle, slammed the door in my face. I thought it was hysterical - and pretended I was trapped by lightly pounding on the windows to "let me out!" She returns to let me out - and I - completely joking - say "Damn, Beeeacch!"

I found out today she wasn't exactly sure I was joking.

She felt like I disrespected her in some way. This is very upsetting to me because she is the last person on earth I would ever really, truly say that to. Since most of my friends now are in their early 20s, it is not entirely uncommon for us to use that term in the lightest sense to greet or jibe each other. I guess I just felt comfortable enough with her to use it.

Needless to say, I apologized profusely, but I am disappointed that I now have this "tarnish" in my stellar record with her. She graciously accepted - but I think she still didn't really understand how I could be joking with her. She just grew up in a time where people didn't say that to each other.

The ironic thing is that I am the first person to get pissed off when someone disrespects another person publicly - like over an email listserve at school - or when they act foolishly in a professional situation. I hope I can learn from this experience, and not be quick to judge so harshly. Fortunately, for me, my professor will not hold it against me for future work, but I'm certain it won't ever happen again - to her or anyone else.

Super Dad

Phoenix was awesome and Spring Training was so much fun!! Except for the motion sickness on the plane-ride home, I had a wonderful, relaxing, much-needed girl time! I feel healthy - like I had a lot of fresh air, and alot of sun (but not sun-damage - SPF 45!!) but I did miss my SO. I couldn't wait to hug him big and tell him the tales of Firecracker and Six. To tell him that I don't have my old Chicago habits of drinking to oblivion...and I returned to town invigorated to stay healthy and in shape. I felt ready to tackle the thesis weeks ahead! And then it was Tuesday.

I was supposed to travel to Mexico on Saturday. That day was moved up - and hence, so were my plans for the week. Now I am frantic to get everything done - and pissed I am rushed! Finish IMS site, migrate data, create 100 images for a report, work all day, do laundry, pack for the week-long camping trip. All this by Thursday night. It is already Wednesday night.

Sheesh. The opportunity to go is one I can't pass up - so I just need to suck it up. Meanwhile, Bear (formerly known as GG) and I will only be able to see each other once before I take off and he goes to SLC for a week of skiing with his family. I'm finding the living together thing more appealing every day.

My dad was a superstar today, though, and went down to my hometown courthouse to retrieve my certified birth certificate. Twice. They rejected him the first time -"because he's not my real dad". Bastards. So I called and sweetly, innocently asked them if I could relenquish my b.c. to "my attorney". No problem. Send a letter. I can't believe an attorney has more clout than the man who raised me for 18 years. Anyhow, I got the b.c. so I can safely cross the border.

He makes me want to be a better person.

Spitfire Spark

If you hold on too tightly, you will find that your arms will eventually get tired and you will need to let go to regain your strength.

This holds true of your mind and your heart as well.

Do yourself a favor today and just let go...see what happens naturally...and tell me how you feel tomorrow...